In the 00’s I started wearing nail polish. I wasn’t sure “why”, but I liked it, so f other people’s opinions.

People thought I was gay. I was bi, but gay guys didn’t find nail polish attractive either, so this was a constant refrain.

(Took me until 2020 to realize I was trans)

I’m doing keto, but with muffins.

Good point. I am slightly salty about flammable and inflammable though.

Alternatively, grasp the bundle with both hands, close to the middle. Rotate your wrists quickly in opposite directions to exert enough sheer force to cleave the spaghetti in twain.

I don’t know why, but the outcome is tastiest if you Robot Chicken an Italian grandmother to watch you do it.

No one will ever convince me that the weapon they “found” wasn’t drenched in Central Park pond water.